Neither A Borrower Nor A Lender Be…

I can’t believe I’m quoting Shakespeare. Not a fan, although, it was due to a couple of the bard’s famous soliloquies I was able to graduate from high school.  In my senior year I was absent thirty-three days (many of them spent watching the goings on in Llanview [One Life to Live…but if you’re been following me, especially as of late, you know that] ) and because I needed to pass English in order to get my diploma, my teacher helped me out greatly by counting certain spelling tests as several grades (provided I got an “A” on it in the first place) and if I could recite the soliloquies from both Hamlet and MacBeth (the dagger one) from start to finish without a fumble, she’d triple count my marks.  Needless to say, I graduated. Thanks, Ms Mac.

Today marks the 34th anniversary of Elvis Presley’s death. I’m having potatoes tonight for dinner in his honor.

Actually, this first picture is my own. It’s the third poppy to grow in my garden and the sturdiest; it’s still standing even after the deluge of rain we’ve been having lately. The other two fell apart after the first day.

Riddle of the day: (thanks KK)

Arnold Schwarzenegger has a big one.

Michael J. Fox has a small one.

Madonna doesn’t have one.

The Pope has one but doesn’t use it.

Clinton uses his all the time.

Obama is one.

Mickey Mouse has an unusual one.

Liberace never used his on women..

Jerry Seinfeld is very, very proud of his.

Cher claims that she took on 3.

We never saw Lucy use Desi’s.

What is it?

The Remarkable Human Body: (thanks JN)

It takes your food seven seconds to get from your mouth to your stomach.

One human hair can support 3 kg (6.6 lb).

The average man’s penis is three times the length of his thumb.

Human thighbones are stronger than concrete.

A woman’s heart beats faster than a man’s.

There are about one trillion bacteria on each of your feet.

Women blink twice as often as men.

The average person’s skin weighs twice as much as the brain.

Your body uses 300 muscles to balance itself when you are standing still.

If saliva cannot dissolve something, you cannot taste it.

Women reading this will be finished now.

Men are still busy checking their thumbs.

 The answer to the riddle is : A LAST NAME.

And the potato reference concering Elvis is an inside joke.  The day he died, that sultry summer day back in 1977, a neighbor of mine who was a die-hard Elvis fan, ran from her house down to ours , as we were sitting down to dinner, landing herself in front of our TV set in the living room, crying uncontrollably holding a half peeled potato in one hand and a potato peeler in the other. She was in the middle of making her own dinner when she heard the news and became distraught and needed to be in the company of those who would understand her plight.


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: