Archive for February, 2013

Easy Just Got Easier

February 13, 2013

Here’s something I just don’t get and I would be remiss if I didn’t quote Sweet Brown with a definitive, “Ain’t Nobody Got Time For That.”  Thanks to my niece, I can now put fact to fancy, in regards to that recent Facebook staple of Sweet Brown’s face and response to all sorts of situations, ie, shoveling now because the snow blower blew up.

Now, we all know how technology allegedly makes our lives so much easier; cell phones that double as portable pocket-sized computers and the world is instantly within reach.  Then came the larger, slightly more cumbersome than a cell phone, but less than a laptop, iPad, which does everything except make a phone call. At press time, I think that’s still the case. But I’m a poor boy who doesn’t get out much so am not privy to the seemingly ever changing world from one day to the next.

Not only can the larger iPad do most things including download digital books so John Q Public on the go doesn’t have to be bothered with carrying around a suddenly troublesome tome, like, say, Rebecca by Daphne Du Maurier or Mightier Than The Pen, by Brian K Sigley, the latter of which mainly because it remains unpublished.  But continued steps are being taken to correct that heinous oversight. And of course, in that vein, there are also “tablets” dedicated solely to downloading books and things of that nature. So, all in all, this fairly lightweight, half inch thick instrument is the portal to the world and delivers it right into the palms of your hands, sometimes without even getting out of your PJ’s.  What could be easier?

Apparently, there is something to make even that easier. I now realize, thanks to an email Ariel got from an online vendor just how difficult andipad holder inconvenient it is to have to hold an iPad in your hands, or even in your lap. It never dawned on me the precious few times I’ve actually held one just what a chore it actually is. There is now an adjustable floor stand that will hold your device securely at the corners with no less than four rubber straps, at each corner; the table  tilts, swivels and adjusts to any height you may need. As you can see in the photo, it’s nothing short of accommodating. Apparently, it even yaws, according to the description. And you know I’m all for yawing. I can’t stress that enough.

Oh boy. Well, I guess if you’re a rabid tablet user you might find it useful, especially while laying down. Who needs an iPad crashing down on your face while you fall asleep?  Well, now you don’t have to worry because you can adjust this stand for that as well. Good lord…

This kind of reminds me of the ridiculousness of Eggies, but that’s another story, which, I may have told already at some point.

On that note, I think I’ll go put my hair up in curlers and strap my cell phone to my wrist because I just can’t bear to have to pick it up should I want to use it later.

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A Little More or Less

February 7, 2013

Well, here it is, February. The Ravens won the Superbowl and Beyonce gyrated her way across the stage, half singing, half encouraging the audience to sing along with her. After all the falderal or her lip-syncing at the Presidential inauguration, her purpose was to prove that she could sing “live.”  Well, the viewing public was wowed by the spectacle of her performance, but I feel she fell short in the “live” singing department. I guess some recording artists are just spectacle.

The groundhog predicted an early spring, and just in time, too. There’s a pending snowstorm heading this way for the weekend. How much snow will we get? Tune in on Sunday when the storm has passed and find out which meteorological wizard came closest to the predicted amounts of 1-3″; 3-5″, 4-8″ or even close to 10″. That’s the job to have, being a weatherman. You can be wrong any percentage of the time in predicting the weather and still keep your job. If you’re right, you’re a hero. If you’re wrong and the  weather isn’t as bad as you first thought, you’re a hero, thanks to Mother Nature’s capriciousness. If you’re wrong and the turnout was worse, you’re sympathetic thanks to Mother Nature’s eccentricities.

And, I suppose, most importantly, we have a new Monopoly game piece. Yes, the voting is over and the announcement was made yesterday morning. Gone is the beloved iron in favor of the cat. It’s hoped that the new game piece will strengthen sales and make the game more relevant. Hmm. I voted on Facebook and suggested to keep the pieces as they are. Another good suggestion (not mine) was to include the proposed new pieces in a blister pack and let the gamer have a wider choice. Parker Brothers probably eschewed the blister pack idea from past experience of how frustrating it is to get any brand of nasal decongestant tablet out of a blister pack. I didn’t want o miss my opportunity to vote on something that doesn’t really matter like I apparently did when I missed my chance to vote on the new colors for M&M’s way back when and now my favorite–Tan–is a mere memory in favor of blue.  Who eats a blue M&M? I don’t. I actually haven’t had M&M’s since.

I saw this curiosity on the news yesterday as well. It’s the Intimacy 2.0 dress. It’s sort of like a mood dress, that changed colors, depending on the wearer’s body heat.  The intent actually, is to indicate whether a woman is being impressed by a man, say at a bar. The more he gets her heart racing, the clearer the dress will become.  If he’s a toad, the dress will stay opaque. Nothing says casual Friday like the Intimacy 2.0.

Speaking of seeing a little “too much”, there’s a situation over in Japan. In the town of Okuizumo there stands a 16-foot replica of Michelangelo’s David. It stands in a large public park that includes a baseball stadium, tennis courts, a mountain bike course and a children’s play area. Whoops. There’s the rub. “They are statues of unclothed humans and such pieces of art work are very rare in our area. Some people said the statues might not be good for their children” said town official Yoji, Morinaga. Some locals have accepted the classic work of art for what it is, but others have asked for David to wear underwear. Then there’ll be the argument over which brand. How about just a fig leaf? Or hang a bird feeder off “him”.

Man, they’re all over this over there. Earlier this week a Tokyo based photographer was arrested for selling books containing photos of male genitals and could be jailed for up to 2 years or fined up to 2 and half million yen ($27,000) if convicted of obscenity.

While pornography is widely available and produced in Japan, under domestic law, genitals must be obscured by some means, usually pixellation.  Hmm, well then it’s not really pornography, is it?

groucho

What else? That’s it for now.  Later!